Introducing Us!
Rod and Heather McEwan were married in 1986 and have seven children—six born between the years 1990 – 2000 with a seventh (encore performance) born in 2007! They live in the Hills of Perth and have attended the Darlington United Church since 1992. Rod is an Estimator in the steel industry, Heather an at-home wife and mother. They have worked in a variety of capacities in family ministry since 1996 with a number of local and national roles.
What we do
Source, create, present and provide ~ resources and encouragement consistent with the Purity Paradigm Mission, Statement of Faith and Principles.
Mission Statement
“To facilitate, perpetuate and participate in a purity paradigm shift – counter to the sexual revolution”.
Introducing the Purity Paradigm to you.
The easiest way to describe how the Purity Paradigm came about is to say that it grew out of the GFI course “Reflections of Moral Innocence” – though when I look back over time there have been quite a number of other influences that have contributed significantly.
In the beginning I was searching for more and complementary information to ROMI - an initial and continuing desire being to provide parents who are raising their children with standards of morality, innocence and purity resources where the “method matches the message”.
I believe a challenge we have as parents is to raise children to be BOTH as innocent as doves AND as wise (some versions of the Bible say shrewd) as a serpent. I believe that over past generations - and still today within our homes - we have often not seen a need for this balance and have tipped the scale to one side or the other. Where innocence has been paramount, children are ill equipped to deal with the world. Where knowledge has been the driving force - we have ridden roughshod over their innocence. Both in balance with other Biblical principles are needed.
One of the earliest things I came to understand as I began this trail of research and study was the difference between the words ‘abstinent’ and ‘pure’. They are not at all equal in meaning. The word ‘abstinent’ refers to that which is left not done – begging the question “how far can I go?”… The word ‘pure’ asks “how pure can I stay?” One lives life at the edge of the paddock fence, the other appreciates the space, safety, freedom and protection of the paddock. ‘Abstinent’ also refers to our action only, where purity brings relationship with God into the equation. Not every Christian parent can say they were abstinent (to whatever degree) before marriage – but all, under the blood of Jesus can say “I am pure”. Purity does not point out failure as much as it brings us into the heart of God.
I believe there is a difference between speaking of sexual dynamics and mechanics. What I call mechanics can lead to stumbling through impure imaginations, where as dynamics is to do with God’s governance and gift, consequences of misuse and equipping to cope with what visually assaults most of us to some degree – every day.
One of the major reasons parents steer clear of speaking about matters pertaining to sexual dynamics with their young people is fear - and one of the reasons fear can develop is due to the incomplete process of repentance and restoration in a parents life due to impure actions before marriage. These parents fear discussions which may lead into areas that they are ashamed of. This however can be used for positive or negative. In the negative it keeps you bound and silent (and silent isn’t silence… it’s the void into which any and all other voices can fall). In the positive this can be a motivator to desire, pray and parent for different outcomes in children’s lives.
As parents and adult Christians we hold much responsibility
… To parent wisely
… To be leaders in today’s church
… To equip our children as leaders of tomorrow’s church.
I was 14 the first time a friend told me she had been raped. She was a year younger than me and it had happened a year previous to that.
I was 15 the first time someone told me they’d had an abortion.
Over the years I have listened first hand to stories of rape, abuse, torture, incest, sexual disease, affairs and consequence, brokenness, suicide attempts, looking and longing for love, marriage breakdown, infidelity, same sex attraction, temptation, violation, sin and brokenness of every degree. These experiences too are an enormous part of the WHY of Purity Paradigm.
Listening to some of this was initially very difficult and readers could be forgiven for thinking I must mix with some ‘out-there’ people. While hopefully that is true, it is also true that these people are a very normal representation of society. As soon as you apply statistics to real people, these experiences become a normal cross-section. We all know these people – whether we know their circumstances or not.
These days I hear the parent’s stories as well. I’ve heard parents tell of abuse committed against their children – diligent parents, good parents, Christian, normal, dedicated parents who discovered in the most painful way possible that some things sometimes get past the best.
The stories of parents who grieve over sexually active, broken, experimenting teens and children. Christian mothers who discover pregnancy tests and other paraphernalia in their teen’s belongings.
I don’t believe that in today’s day and age that there can be any newcomers into the Church who do not come with some degree of sexual brokenness – nor perhaps too many already within it without the same.
Can those with a past - love and lead today - and the children in the church of tomorrow, both by example and an experience of forgiveness and restoration? Can those without such experience of forgiveness learn to love and lead in grace and compassion?
“Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little."
Luke 7:47
Will we react and project rejection in our shock for lack of understanding of present day reality? Can we learn to love and lead through knowledge, wisdom, truth, grace, gentleness and understanding? Can and will we equip our children to do the same in the right time? Can we give them a foundation from which they may choose to love and lead?
It is also true that all will approach purity from different starting points. That no matter how similar the starting points, differences in the journey will be evident. If two neighbors head for the city – their journey will be different. They will be stopped by different traffic lights and change lanes at different times. If two friends approach the city from north and south, their journeys will be much more different though they are headed for the same destination. In all of parenting this is true. I once heard one family criticize another family – the first being surprised to hear the second had done the same parenting course they had - commenting harshly. The first were coming from the journey starting point of many generations of Christian heritage. The second – from no Christian heritage whatsoever. Does the journey look different – yes. Is the hearts desire and destination the same – yes.
Statement of Faith
We believe the Bible to be the inspired and authoritative Word of God .
We believe there is one true God, manifested eternally in three distinct Persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
We believe in the deity of Jesus Christ, the second person of the Trinity, who possesses all the divine attributes and is coequal, coexistent, and coeternal with the Father. We believe in His virgin birth, that He was God incarnate (both God and man), for the purpose of revealing the Father, redeeming men and ruling over God's Kingdom. He accomplished man's redemption by the vicarious and atoning death through His shed blood and sacrificial death on the cross. By His literal, physical resurrection from the dead and His ascension to the right hand of the Father, the sinner is justified. We believe Jesus to be the mediator between God and man who will return in glory to judge all mankind.
We believe the Holy Spirit is the third member of the Trinity, possessing all the divine attributes with the Father and the Son. The Holy Spirit is the super-natural and sovereign agent in regeneration, baptizing all believers into the body of Christ at the moment of conversion. The Holy Spirit also indwells, sanctifies, instructs, and empowers all believers for spiritual service.
We believe in the present ministry of the Holy Spirit who administers spiritual gifts to each believer for the purpose of equipping the saints and for the building up of the body of Christ.
We believe in the bodily resurrection of both the saved and lost, the saved to eternal life and the lost to everlasting punishment.
We believe that all who place their faith in Jesus Christ are placed by the Holy Spirit into the spiritual body of believers known as the church, with Christ established as the head. The purpose of the church is to glorify God by the teaching and instruction of the Word, by building the faith of its members, by providing an atmosphere of worship, by providing fellowship, and by fulfilling the great commission to reach the world for Jesus Christ. We believe that man is a sinner and that the penalty for sin is eternal separation from the Father. We believe that eternal life is a free gift of grace bestowed upon each repentant sinner who responds in faith to the provision of salvation in Jesus Christ. Regeneration is instantaneous and is accomplished solely by the power of the Holy Spirit. Genuine regeneration will manifest itself by righteous attitudes, edifying conduct, and good works to the extent that each believer submits himself to the control of the Holy Spirit.
Purity Paradigm Key Scriptures
Keep yourself pure.
1TI 5:22b (NIV)
I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.
MAT 10:16 (NIV)
...I want you to be wise about what is good, and innocent about what is evil.
RO 16:19b (NIV)
Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed. As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.”
1PE 1:13-16 (NIV)
Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.
DT 6:4-7 (NIV)
How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word.
PS 119:9 (NIV)
Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
1TI 4:12
…so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe.
PHP 2:15 (NIV)
Where there is no revelation, the people cast off restraint; but blessed is he who keeps the law.
PR 29:18 (NIV)
Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.
PR 29:18 (KJV)
But if you do not listen, I will weep in secret because of your pride; my eyes will weep bitterly, overflowing with tears, because the LORD’s flock will be taken captive.
JER 13:17 (NIV)
But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.
2 TIM 3:14-15 (NIV)
So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.
RO 12:1-2 (Message)
Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control.
PR 25:28 (NIV)
From that day on, half of my men did the work, while the other half were equipped with spears, shields, bows and armor. The officers posted themselves behind all the people of Judah who were building the wall. Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other, and each of the builders wore his sword at his side as he worked.
NE 4:16-18 (NIV)
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.
MK 12: 30
